There’s No Place Like Home
I was chatting with a friend the other day who commented that I never travel. I don’t. Ever. Hardly ever. I rarely leave Spartanburg to take a "vacation".
After our conversation, I thought more about it. There was a time in my life when I loved to go, go, go. There was a time in my life when I didn’t think I could get out of Spartanburg fast enough. So I moved away…to Atlanta, Wilmington, NC, Boone, NC then Los Angeles. The only time I traveled when I lived in those places…I traveled to Spartanburg. And now that I’m back in Spartanburg…I go nowhere.
I’m almost 40 and I don’t have a passport. I’ve never even been to New York City. Sometimes I think that is sad. I mean…NYC?!?! How is it that I lived in Los Angeles for almost 3 years yet I’ve never visited NYC? Who knows.
Anyhoo, I started thinking of how happy it makes me that I’m happy where I am. I spent so many years searching for happy. I always thought it would be somewhere besides here. And it wasn’t. I finally figured out happy is whatever I make it to be.
Don’t get me wrong…I’m not saying I’ll never travel. I enjoy our yearly family beach trip to Edisto although we never stay the whole week because I’m always ready to get home. This past year, we spent a long weekend up in the NC mountains and although I tried to convince David on the first night we should go home the next day…we stayed. And had a blast. We managed to meet some locals and they invited us to their neighborhood party and I loved that, of course. I even met a former Greenville City Councilman there and we talked politics. I guess I’m just drawn to community and politics wherever I go.
And I’ve always wanted to visit the Forbidden City and Eastern Europe to see the concentration camps. But, visiting those places takes a lot of money not to mention it will also mean I have to overcome the fear of flying I’ve developed since my children were born.
I used to love to fly. I loved to get to the airport early, hang out at the bar, meet people, watch people and fly off but I’ve only flown once since my children were born and I swore if I ever got off that plane I’d never leave my kids again.
I know, I know. Planes are safer, etc. etc. But, for some reason, I was scared the last time I flew.
So, all those things…I just don’t travel. Which leads me to yet another conversation with a friend.
I was chatting with my buddy Ned over coffee last week when he told me about a presentation he recently saw where the speaker said he believed happiness was linked to community pride—love of community. So I put that conversation with the travel conversation and came to the conclusion that maybe I’m just where I need to be. I see the good in what is around me and it makes my life good. It took me a while to realize that. I spent a lot of time and money searching and while I wouldn’t take anything for those experiences, I am now surrounded by family, great friends and a place that I am willing to work my butt off to make it better…and I couldn’t be happier.
And all the traveling in the world can’t top that because at the end of the day…you always have to come back home.
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on 01 Feb 2010 at 3:05 pm # gb
Thanks for the post. Interesting.
I’ve wondered about traveling and what it means to me. As someone over 50, I just travel because I enjoy it, and find it interesting to meet new pleases, cultures, things, etc. (Last year, 3 weeks in Ecuador, 3 weeks S. Africa, 2 weeks in Kuai, 1 week in Montreal, 3 weeks in TN, NC, & SC, a couple of weeks camping out and backpacking).
I do see some drawbacks. I’m not as able to commit myself to local things, such as volunteering and my church.
And I’ve upped the level of what it takes for me to find life as enjoyable, which I sometimes wonder about. After being at home for a week, I get that, “I’m bored” feeling.
I’m sure that after adjusting, I’d develop new and interesting things by just staying in one place.
But for now, I feel extremely lucky that I’m given the rare opportunity to travel, and not sure how long it will last.
I guess after living for 23 years with HIV/AIDS I see each day as precious, and don’t want to waste it, so I’m grabbing as much as opportunity give me.
But — The last thing I want to do it stop traveling just from the fear of doing so, whether it’s lonely, fear of flying, or afraid of being being away from familiar things or people, or outside of my comfort level.
What’s the worst thing that can happen? The plane will crash or that I’ll stop being excited about the vast and interesting world around me. Being “me”, is not about being in a place/time, but deeper than that.
Just some thought.
And off to San Francisco.